Sunday 31 May 2009

出口

词曲:徐佳莹

火车行到伊都阿末伊都丢 哎哟磅空内
磅空里面的我啥咪拢不惊 因为有你的期待
回荡在心口的一字一句 暗夜中将我照亮
那是最温暖也最有力量的 你给的星光

就算不知道出口是什么模样
我会继续的前往
挣脱了捆绑
主宰心里头的天光

就当不知道失败会是怎样的重量
这小小的舞台 有我大大的梦想
还有你陪伴的目光
看我不迷失方向
为你而闪烁的模样
看我为你而闪烁的模样

So... Random....

Life is unpredictable. For the past 1 year, i live alone, far away from my family's protection and i met these random people in my life. I might just see them for few minutes but their speech and action could make me remember them for life. Some of them left me happy memories but some of them just remind me of how sweet my family was being my angel and guardian throughout my life.

Here i would like to share 2 occasions that i met these 2 random feeling that remind me of my friends and family...

1. Young Malaysian Chinese Girl Vs. Perverted Indian Muslim Old Man
There was this RANDOM old Indian man that i met on the bus was saying hi to me, and being polite i said hi to him as well. Then he started to ask me am i from Malaysia, then i said yes... then, again being polite, i asked him where was he from, he said Mumbay, India. Ok... Fine.. I thought our conversation would end here. But... he started asking few weird questions... eg: Are you a Muslim? Are you Married? (Stupid Me!!! I should be more alert when he asked these questions but I was just stupid and naive....) Ok finally we talked something more normal... He said he likes durian, then again being polite i said me too....
Then finally the bus reached the bus station. I was about to go off, he came to shake hand with me... (I know it's weird, again i should be smarter and run away when the bus reached the station..) Stupid me!!! The very wrong thing i did was........... I took my hand out and shook hand with him........ And the next moment... I was stunned... He moved his face towards me... And i believe my pupils were dilated as a result of fight and flight response because i could see his lips clearly. He moved his face towards my face and he.....KISSED on my cheek... I was totally IN SHOCKED!!! and the next thing i knew was i walked away from him.... I feel that i was MOLESTED... He's a muslim... even if i am single.. how could he do this to me??? He is just a random people. even if i am in UK, it's normal for their culture to hug and give a goodbye kiss... but i just couldnt believe it happened to me.... Never ever had anyone kiss on my cheek apart from my lovely cutie cousins... and of course never ever to be an old man... I would probably could accept it if he was a young, cute, charming, white guy...
For once, i regret not bringing any friends with me... For once, i hate myself for being too naive and not alarmed... For once, i wish i could have a boy friend could help me go and punch the old man... For once, i wish my family is around and comfort me or even take legal action against this perveted "uncle"... But it's too late... I couldnt recognise the old man even if i decided to sue him . Hahaha...

2. Young Malaysian Chinese Girl Vs. Young African Muslim Man
So another random experience on the bus, I couldnt believe this would happen as it was just 5 min journey from the hospital to my former house. So i met this African guy who said hi to me, and being polite, i said hi to him. Then he asked am i a chinese? I said i am a malaysian. Am i married? and i am a honest person i said no (probably i can consider lying to avoid all the troubles, i hope the Buddha will forgive me when i lie, but i was just to honest... and stupid...)Then he started telling me that the story of his relatives in London married a Malaysian... I felt it's weird, i didnt want to know the story... What has it got to do with me??? But obviously i didnt say that...
Another weird thing would be he showed me his ID and asked am i a student, oh yes, i am... so.... I didnt want to see his ID... What has it got to do with me??? Then for the very first time in my life, there's some one that praised me and i felt very weird instead of feeling happy. He said that i have got very NICE TEETH...Out of so many parts of my face... It's not my eyes, not my nose, not my lips, but my teeth.... And this coming out from someone that i first met...
And i reached my stop already, i quickly stood up and told him that i'm getting off soon. Then guess how he ended our RANDOM conversation??? He lifted his hands up and started praying in the bus... And wished me luck for my studies... (I think i should feel touched but i could only say thank you...)
At least, this African man is less harmless than the Indian old man... But, afterall, he's just weird...

If i could bring a friend with me, maybe the outcome of the story would be changed. Hahaha... But i guess this is part of life, meeting random people... Luckily i didnt lose much apart from losing a kiss... yuck yuck.. now that i think of it, i feel like going to wipe and clean my face..... Ishhhhhhhhhhh....

Wednesday 13 May 2009

你是友情,还是错过的爱情?

最近,周杰伦的《蒲公英的约定》不断在脑海中出现,想起了那一句。。

一起长大的约定 那样真心 与你聊不完的曾经
而我已经分不清 你是友情还是错过的爱情。。。

当然,我和你没什么约定,别说蒲公英了,连个大红花约定都没。。。
反正约定与承诺都只是包袱。。。倒不如像现在一样顺其自然得更好。。。

我的真心,从没让你知道,也不知道该不该让你知道。。。
我喜欢和你聊的不止曾经,我喜欢聊现在,更喜欢聊未来与我们的梦想。。。

而我应该还分得清楚,你是友情,或许比友情多一点吧。。。
友达以上,恋人未满的境界。。。
肯定的是,还没到爱情,单方面的真心,怎能说是爱情。。。
如果不是爱情,那就不会错过了,我错过了吗?

Monday 11 May 2009

你不是真正的快乐

作词:五月天 作曲:五月天

人 群中 哭著 你只想变成透明的颜色
你再也不会梦 或痛 或心动了
你已经决定了 你已经决定了
你 静静 忍著 紧紧把昨天在拳心握著
而回忆越是甜 就是 越伤人了
越是在 手心留下 密密麻麻 深深浅浅 的刀割

你不是真正的快乐 你的笑只是你穿的保护色
你决定不恨了 也决定不爱了
把你的灵魂关在永远锁上的躯壳

这 世界 笑了 於是你合群的一起笑了
当生存是规则 不是 你的选择
於是你 含著眼泪 飘飘荡荡 跌跌撞撞 的走著

你不是真正的快乐 你的笑只是你穿的保护色
你决定不恨了 也决定不爱了
把你的灵魂关在永远锁上的躯壳

你不是真正的快乐 你的伤从不肯完全的愈合
我站在你左侧 却像隔著银河
难道就真的抱著遗憾一直到老了 然后才后悔著

你值得真正的快乐 你应该脱下你穿的保护色
为什麼失去了 还要被惩罚呢
能不能就让 悲伤全部 结束在此刻 重新开始活著

Sunday 10 May 2009

你说

你说
猪流感蔓延至英国,要我照顾自己
我知道了

你说
我没有良心,因为忙着读书
但我有打电话给你

你说
我去旅行时要自己小心
我会小心的

你说
要买生日礼物给我
我超感动的

你说
要寄包裹给我
我在等着

你说
有千言无语要告诉我
我在听着

你说
你想念我
我明白,我也想念你。。。的手艺

你说
你爱我
我了解,但我就是没有勇气当面说出口
我也是。

保重,妈。
母亲节快乐。

Friday 1 May 2009

Swine flu

The first time i have heard of Swine flu was earlier this week because my clinical partner was telling me that the outbreak has reached UK. As time goes by i heard it more frequent from the news from the radio and stupidly i thought it was "Swan flu" as it's derived from Avian flu and Swan is associated with the birds. In fact, that was not the case, Swine flu is related to the pigs rather than the birds.

I only cleared my doubt about "Swan" flu until mum called me yesterday as she knew that Swine flu has crossed over the Atlantic Ocean and came to UK, she confused me with the term "猪流感” which literally means Pig flu as Swine flu was transmissible by pigs. Finally after Google it from the internet, i found out that i have mistaken Swine flue as Swan flu. My mum was worried as it can cause death by just the flu itself. While blogging about this topic, BBC news has released an update that there are now 11comfirmed cases in UK and one NHS clerical worker has infected.

Everyone gets very worried, not only the public but also the NHS staffs. The hospitals are more aware and alert and and having meetings and discussions on how to manage this outbreak (personally i think it's stil too early to say as an outbreak, and certainly not a pandemic yet but it looks like it's going towards this trend.) And, we as the medical students have asked to attend a talk about the trust policy and management of this outbreak 2hours ago. Our hospital has decided to split Preston, which's taking the flu-admitted patients and Chorley, taking the non-flu patients. And in Preston, 4units are selected to accomodate the patients, which are the respiratory ward, 2 side rooms in Paeds ward, the Primary Care Trust, and also A&E. The pateints would be admitted to the isolated room as to prevent infection but the dilemma is you want to save them at the same time we are restrciting the patients as they are contagious.

Patients are not allowed to get out of the room unless they are going for urgent investigations. Even if they need to go out and use the lift, make sure the lift is empty. Visitors are not allowed to visit the patients at the moment to prevent the spread. If you find yourself having flu, the advice is stay at home and ring the GP to come and visit you instead of you going out to the hospital, approaching the public and spread the disease.

The infection control team has came out with the rules of prevent spreading. We were advised to put on the PPE-personal protective equipment and the sequence of putting on and removing are important. Put on the apron --> mask-->gloves. Remove apron-->gloves-->mask. remove the mask last as you dont use the gloves to touch it and contaminated to gloves and further contaminate the apron/ your own clothes after that. But do not forget to wash hands and alcohol gel is effective against the infection. The normal mask is only useful for 2hours, and need to be changed every 2hours. FPP3 mask can last longer for 4hr and our hospital is going to order extra as a mode of prevention. Next, we were recommended to bring our clothes and change while working in the hospital so that we dont bring our dirty/contaminated clothes back home and infect other people at home. We were told to check the updates from Health Protection Agency on the infection control.

The whole approach will be different when it comes to a pandemic. At the moment they would swab all the patients that come in with flu-like symptoms. But when it comes to a pandemic, it's no point to swab the patients, just treat the patients immediately as per Swine flu management. By looking at the condition now, prevention is better than cure. And the group of population that the hospital is trying to protect are the repiratory compromised and children. Every unit that is involved is working on it and helping to prevent a pandemic from happening.

We shall pray and wish to condition does not turn worst. Remember, PPE, hand washing, and now might be the best time for us to stay at home and study for finals. Metta to everyone.